Ultra-muddled thoughts of an impatient youth

An interesting day to be sure.  Our youth group led a service at a local assisted living facility in the area and it went well.  I guess it was interesting because I led it--the whole thing.  The only thing I didn't do was the closing prayer (thank you Uncle Paul).  Sure this may sound like a good thing for me, and I will not deny that it was good for me--a good experience.  However, I had a tough time last night with the whole idea.  Why can't there be anyone else willing to do parts of it.  Am I the only one in the youth group willing and semi-able to do something like that.  What about public prayer?  Isn't this simple excercise something which we should all be willing to learn to do?  Leadership!  Is the church supposed to by full of people who depend on the leadership of one or two?  Shouldn't Christian young men in the church be learning this?

Last night, I finally decided that I would not hold back or wait for others to come beside me when it came to this service.  I knew if I did hold back and push others forward, the meeting would not work...  Last time we did one of these services, it was at a nursing home.  Yes, it was harder because there was a difference in the condition of the people at the service but even so, there was also some difficulty with simply trying to make things happen!  There were moments when things would just stop and you would wonder who was going to get it going again.  Indecision!  Who is in charge? 

This time was going to be different--and it was.  If I just up and ran the whole meeting, there would be no arguments because no one else wanted to do it anyway!  It would eliminate the problem of indecision--one person leading and speaking.  But what of the cost?  I need to have some kind of hope that stepping forward as I did, I didn't just peg myself as the one person who will do this kind of thing!  I need to believe that there are young people other than myself who are willing to step forward and serve!  It's a scary thought! 
 
My thoughts stray to this evening at church.

Uncle Paul asked me if I could lead the song service in his absence, which I did.  Simple enough--you just start a ten minute block of time with a song and ask for selections after that!  But wait!  The only other people who lead this thing are mostly officers in the church (uncle Paul is a deacon)!  Where does that put me!?  That's another scary thought!

Time is short--I promised *someone* that I would be off by a certain time and that time has arrived.