Still learning
Well, some things still come hard. I just don't know what I will do if I continue to stress out about every story I'm assigned. If every time I trip on a snag I go ballistic and run screaming around in circles, how long may I expect to continue till my hair turns to a distinguished salt-n-pepper gray?
Is that my personality--to over-react like some child who is sure the monster will come out from under his bed as soon as his eyes are shut? Personality--I rather hope not. It is a "bent" of mine to be sure; a habit could also be blamed.
Yet still, just as faithfully as I should have grown to expect by now, God works a beautiful pattern out of the mess I love to see. I know most of the individual failings that put me there by heart--there is no doubt about that. I bang my head against the wall, pace around in circles and try not to sound impatient on the phone with interviewees. Yet, in the midst of my latest fever of chaotic panic, God made Himself heard--as He always does. I was without a needed interview last night. I went to bed, knowing that in all likelihood there would be no one available on Saturday. That would have been a nasty thought to sleep on if it weren't that I also remembered that my Father doesn't deal in likelihoods. He deals with us as His children and what is best for His children is always granted no matter what the likelihood. I slept well last night.
The next morning at 8:30 I awoke to a phone call from one of the best possible contacts I could have gotten--someone I was told was out of town. He told me he had listened to a somewhat impatient sounding voice mail and decided to call me up before he left town... Talk about humbling. You can be sure that all trace of impatience had disappeared by this time.
I'm learning...
...that living as a covenant child of God should mean fewer gray hairs at my age.
Is that my personality--to over-react like some child who is sure the monster will come out from under his bed as soon as his eyes are shut? Personality--I rather hope not. It is a "bent" of mine to be sure; a habit could also be blamed.
Yet still, just as faithfully as I should have grown to expect by now, God works a beautiful pattern out of the mess I love to see. I know most of the individual failings that put me there by heart--there is no doubt about that. I bang my head against the wall, pace around in circles and try not to sound impatient on the phone with interviewees. Yet, in the midst of my latest fever of chaotic panic, God made Himself heard--as He always does. I was without a needed interview last night. I went to bed, knowing that in all likelihood there would be no one available on Saturday. That would have been a nasty thought to sleep on if it weren't that I also remembered that my Father doesn't deal in likelihoods. He deals with us as His children and what is best for His children is always granted no matter what the likelihood. I slept well last night.
The next morning at 8:30 I awoke to a phone call from one of the best possible contacts I could have gotten--someone I was told was out of town. He told me he had listened to a somewhat impatient sounding voice mail and decided to call me up before he left town... Talk about humbling. You can be sure that all trace of impatience had disappeared by this time.
I'm learning...
...that living as a covenant child of God should mean fewer gray hairs at my age.
posted by Mark at 11:15 PM
Post a Comment